California parents like you want what is best for your child in any situation. This especially applies to situations that have the potential to cause trauma or harm to them. Going through a divorce is one of these situations, and you want to limit the damage as best you can.
Because of that, you may have some questions. For one, when is the best time to break the news? Is there a right way to do it? Is there a way you can mitigate the damage done?
There is no right way, right place or right time
Psychology Today discusses different tips for telling your child about your upcoming divorce. Unfortunately, there is no right way or right time to break news of a divorce. No matter when you decide to tackle the topic, it will be difficult for everyone involved. Even adult children struggle to process their parents getting a divorce, let alone younger children. The first thing to do? Let go of the idea that you can do it a “right way” and save your child from all heartbreak.
You can still do damage control
The next thing to do is focus on mitigating the damage that does happen, unavoidable as it is. For example, experts suggest that you do not wait too long to tell your child. Uncertainty and fear of the unknown often fuel most of a child’s anxieties surrounding divorce. Being frank and open about it from early on can help them cope.
Also, get on the same page with your co-parent. Your child does not need to know about the struggles of your divorce. All they need to know is that they can still depend and rely on you even when you split.